Best advice for speed dating

You can talk to your girlfriends anywhere, but you’re at a mixer to meet men.

Even a quarterback would be intimidated to break through that defensive line.

Men and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short "dates" usually lasting from three to eight minutes depending on the organization running the event.

At the end of each interval, the organizer rings a bell, clinks a glass, or blows a whistle to signal the participants to move on to the next date.

When you pretend to be somebody you’re not, it will make you uncomfortable, and this can show through in other ways. Your date mentions how nice you look, and you point out the microscopic stain that your dry cleaner missed, or you mention that’s because they don’t know you well enough. Instead, be polite and offer a simple thank you with a smile. Maybe a bit of clarification is in order on this one.Through their experiences, and my own as a dating coach and former dater, here are some things to think about the next time you mix and mingle. Showing up in a gaggle —This is the #1 thing that separates a good mixer from a bad one.Women tend to come to events with a girlfriend (or three) which is okay as long as you’re not joined at the hip or seated together the whole time.While everyone from PUA’s to advice columnists are keen to give step-by-step practical guidance in how to achieve success at speed dating events, John argues that these mean nothing without a deeper appreciation of how and why such techniques work.Dating columns and lifestyle magazines are cottoning on to the re-emergence of speed dating as the best way to meet people.